THE LOVE THAT SUSTAINS IT ALL.
The word “love” gets thrown around a lot these days and applied to all sorts or types of relationships / emotions. But practically, only two types of love seem to bind marriages and sustain relationships amongst all. These types of love are carefully explained in details below:
- Eros Love: – Is a type of love felt with the physical body, which sends or emits some form of physical sensation. It is the love we see celebrated in music and movies – romantic, dizzying, attraction that most couples feel in the initial phase of a relationship. While Eros isn’t the whole picture, it’s an important component of a thriving marriage and should be nurtured over the long term.
Examples of Eros love is, looking nice for your spouse, flirting, and keeping the chemistry alive, continuous dating even after the kids arrive. A long romantic dinner or a slow walk without the kids helps you fan the flame or desire when the pressure of life and parenthood threatens to quench it and is thus recommended to improve Eros Love.
Other examples, include, making time for intimacy, getting the kids to bed earlier, turn off the TV, and go to bed together. Even if you just cuddle and whisper, it’s good for the soul and for building the Eros connection.
Eros love will not be the same throughout your marriage, as it will be different in the early stages, if compared to the later stages. Thus we need not overlook its importance and therefore, should strive to figure out what it looks like in your marriage today, nurture and sustain it for a great and improved marriage!
- Agape Love. Agape love is the type of love that holds family together. It is more parental, mature and sacrificial kind of love. Agape puts the beloved first and sacrifices pride, self-interest and possessions for the sake of that beloved.
It is a selfless, unconditional type of love that helps people to forgive one another, to respect one another, and to serve one another, day in and day out. Unfortunately, many modern couples think that when Eros love is lagging, there’s nothing left to bind a marriage together. But agape love is the glue that keeps your relationship intact while you rehabilitate other areas that need work.
Here are some ways that agape love is lived out in marriage:
Respecting your spouse, even when you don’t really “like” him/her OR think he/she deserves it.
Serving your spouse and family’s needs, even when you’re not sure they truly appreciate it.
Forgiving your spouse when he/she screws up, and understanding that tomorrow, it may be you who needs forgiving.
Putting your spouse’s needs before your own.
Of course, every marriage requires give and take, and you cannot force your spouse to show you the agape love you desire nor command it.
What you can do to change the temperature and dynamics of your relationship is to model the kind of self-sacrificial love you’d like to receive yourself.
You may be surprised to see how this motivates your spouse to return the favor and most importantly love God with all your heart and abide by his words and watch him fill your heart with love.